Ani's Show: Tekken Edition
by AniDenDav
Summary: That's right. Questions will be asked by YOU, the fans, and the Tekken fighters will be forced to answer them. This chapter: cake and OOCness will ensue! This story has been rewriten from the crap it use to be, to something a little more decent.
1. The Cake Is a Lie

**Ani's Show**

Anisha: Welcome to Ani's Show, my video game nerds of Tekken!

Darius: Why are you insulting the audience? They might just retaliate against you just like Ani did.

*Anisha giving him the derp face*: No one asked you announcer man.

Jin: It's true!

Anisha: Was I talking to you?

Anna: She's just mad because Jin finally saw that Anisha was a Mary-Sue.

Anisha: I am not a Mary-Sue!

Nina: Believe me honey, you are.

Anisha: ANYWAY! You may have noticed that we were off air for a while. Since the Ani saw how actrocious her writing and grammer was when she first started on this website, she finally decided to delete this story and start anew.

Lee: Believe me, she needed to.

Anisha: Couldn't have agreed with you better! Now to fill in on what's happening now, for actions on the last show -

Darius: Which included kidnapping the host and blowing up the studio...

Anisha: Ani will be held in a metal cage suspended in mid-air for the rest of the show. But she won't be alone, for we are sticking Bryan Fury in there with her!

Random person from audience: Make them fight to the death!

Xiaoyu: Whoa now, are you trying to make this like _The Hunger Games_? 'Cause if you are, I wanna be Katniss!

Lili: No way, you're too bubbly to be her.

*Xiaoyu with hands on hips*: And what is that supposed to mean?

*Ani in cage*: That you define what it means to be annoying! And will someone get me down from here?

Kazuya: Nah. I think you should stay up there for a while.

Ani: Why – bitch!

Asuka: You know, all this talk about _The Hunger Games_ is making me think about when Ani dragged Kazuya to see the midnight premiere.

Anisha: Marik roll the clip!

Marik: Rolling!

*In the cinema*

*Ani standing up*: I volunteer as tribute!

Kazuya: Will you sit down? The movie hasn't even started yet. *he pulls Ani down* And I can't believe you dragged me here, _and_ made me pay for the movie and popcorn!

Ani: So what? You're rich; you won't miss that pocket change.

Xiaoyu: Will you guys keep it down? Some people are trying to watch the movie!

Ani: Xiao? When did you get here?

Xiaoyu: Are you kidding? I love the Hunger Games! Now shut up so I can watch the movie.

*Ani mumbling*: Bitch.

*Bob and Ganryu walk in and sit right in front of Kazuya and Ani, blocking their view*

Kazuya: What the hell? Get your fat asses up and sit in the back!

Bob: Now way! I've been waiting to see this movie since 2010!

Xiaoyu: . . . but they announced the movie in October.

Bob: That just goes to show you that I'm a more dedicated fan than you.

*Xiaoyu standing up*: What did you and your fat just say?

*Bob snapping fingers* You heard me.

Xiaoyu: Bitch! *she tackles Bob and fights beating the crap out of him*

Ani: Should we stop it?

Hwoarang: Nah.

Kazuya: I'm going to regret asking this, but why are you here?

Hwoarang: Are you kidding? I love Jennifer Lawrence. Girl got it going on!

*Asuka, who is sitting right next to him, slaps Hwoarang*

Asuka: You said that if I went to this movie-date-thing, that you would be civilised.

*Xiaoyu popping her head trough the fight cloud*: Are you kidding? Hwoarang and civilised shouldn't belong in the same sentence.

*Effie Trinket on movie screen*: Peeta Mellark!

*The fight cloud goes away and reveals Bob in a headlock*

Xiaoyu: Now move – Eh? The movie started already?

*Ganryu sipping on a coke*: If you had been paying attention, you would have known that.

The female audience: Oh Peeta!

Kazuya: I can't believe I have to sit through two hours of this crap.

*Clip ends*

Jun: How was the movie?

Kazuya: Actually pretty interesting. I enjoyed the Bloodbath most of all.

*Everybody glares*

Alisa: You have issues.

Anisha: Moving on! Since no one asked any questions, we're making up one's of our own.

Lili: Isn't that what you've been doing anyways?

Anisha: Actually no; Ani's friends from school came up with questions. Given that they know almost absolutely **nothing** about Tekken, they asked some pretty interesting questions.

Lee: Oh Lawd, get ready for this.

Anisha: First question from Ani's classmate, Ellen: What's up with Kazuya's hair?

Steve: That's really a good question.

Kazuya: -_- Have you seen any anime TV shows? _Everybody's_ hair is fucked up!

Lili: Mine isn't. *Flips hair*

Nina: Every time you open your mouth, you sound like a brainless child of Aphrodite.

Lili: I beg your pardon?

*Alisa putting her forefingers to her temples*: Aphrodite is the Greek goddess of love and beauty. The concept Nina is referring to comes from the New York Best-selling series, _Percy Jackson and the Olympians._ The series revolves around a young boy who finds out he is the demigod son of Poseidon and tries to defeat the series' antagonist, Kronos, the Lord of Time, and his rival Luke, son of Hermes.

*Awkward silence*

Anisha: That's . . . pretty accurate.

Lili: And what does that have to do with me?

*Bryan from cage*: It means you're a dumb blond!

*Ani face palms*

Anisha: Next question! From Ani's friend Trevor –

Ani: More like mortal enemy!

Anisha: He asks if Lee is supposed to look like a female stripper.

Lee: Excuse me?

*Kazuya giggles*

Jin: O_O NEVER do that again!

*Anisha looking through cards*: There are actually quite a few people who asked this same question.

Hwoarang: Fail!

Lee: Your mom fails.

Audience: Ooooohhhh . . .

Anisha: You still haven't answered the question.

Lee: For his information, I look downright sexy.

Leo: You're about as sexy as Ganryu.

Ganryu: Why thank you!

Leo: -_- That's not a damn complement!

Anisha: This one is about you, Leo. From the producer's friends Chloe and Kiara: Is Leo supposed to be Justin Bieber?

Ani: Ha! They're in my sixth period. EVERYBODY in there asked the same question!

Leo: I refuse to answer it.

Anisha: You'll talk soon . . .

*Bruce, who was sitting next to Anisha scoots his chair away*

Anisha: Now the last question is from Kenia and Stephanie about Heihachi: You look like a paedophile with all that old saggy bits you call muscle. Don't you scare kids when you go out in the street?

Bryan: This reminds of the fourth tournament when Heihachi wore that diaper.

*Everybody shudders*

Heihachi: I am not a paedophile! And my muscle is not old saggy bits.

Jin: Yes they are.

*Heihachi gives him the derp face and throws him on a table*

Anisha: Hey watch it! That table is mahogany!

Jin: You don't care for my well-being?

Asuka: No one does since you've become the douche of Tekken.

Anna: I'm starting to think that's his official title.

Jin: You. Are. All. Bitches.

Steve: Don't deny the Gospel truth!

Anisha: There's actually one more card left, but it's not a question. From Anonymous: The cake is a lie!

*Ani jumping up and down in the cage*: Oh! Portal reference! That means it's from Lathen!

Jin: I remember when I first played that game . . .

Anisha: Marik!

Marik: On it!

*flashback*

*Jin is sitting in front of the TV with eyes bloodshot and stubble appearing on his face*

Jin: I **must** get that cake!

*Several hours later*

Jin: Yes! Take that you psycho bitch! I finally beat GLaDOS! Now where's my cake?

*Nina pops her head through the door*: The cake is a lie.

Jin: What? No it can't be! NOOOO!

*flashback ends*

Alisa: How could you not know there wouldn't be any cake? There's a room you have to walk into that says "The cake is a lie" all over the walls.

Jin: I thought it was trying to discourage me!

*Alisa whispering to Jun*: I am so sorry about your son's condition.

Jin: I don't have a condition!

*Bryan to Ani*: Will you stop jumping? Your weight is shaking the cage!

Ani: No it's not! It's Bob's fat ass sitting on top of it! *both look up and see the top of the cage caved in. The chains holding it break and all three go down*

*Bryan holds up a sign*: Help!

Anisha: If you wreck this studio again Imma go ghetto on your ass!

Darius: AANNNDD it looks like we are out of time. Join us the next time Ani decides to update on "Ani's Show"!

Marik: And we are clear!


	2. Post Halloween

**Ani's Show**

**A/N: So yeah, haven't updated in a while, but this time I'm just going to say that I was too lazy to. With the truth now in the open, let's move on!**

* * *

Darius: Welcome to Ani's Show! With your host, Anisha Davidson!

Anisha: Thank you, and Happy Halloween! I already went Trick o' Treating on Wednesday –

Marik: With you as the trick…

Ani: Wow, not even five seconds into the episode, and we're dissing Anisha. That's GOT to be a new record.

Anisha: MOVING ON! Even though Halloween is over, Ani still thought she should update this story since it's been a while. So no Halloween theme!

Xiaoyu*hyper*: WHY NOT? I thought we were going to get more candy! *She starts jumping off the walls* Candy, candy! I. Want. More. Candy!

Jin: Hurry! Someone go get the tranquilizer!

*Lee gets out a needle and sticks it in Xiao's thigh. She immediately stops and falls in Hwoarang's arms.*

Anisha:…Okay then. On to questions!

_That. Was. So. AWESOME! I am one of those nerds! And Hwoarang got OWNED by Lee! Anyways, I wanna ask a few questions :D. I think I know SOME Tekken...*Cracks Fingers*_

Jin: YOU'RE A B**CH BC...but you're still my first favorite :D. I HATE YOUR GAUNTLETS! They make you look like a witch, although you can do that on your own since you were born that way. Oh right questions! Ya know, why didn't ya just LEARNED how to control the Devil Gene and defeat your family that's the douchebag part, and then you can like a happy normal life? And I'm surprised you didn't change it to Kazama Zaibatsu since you hate Mishima's. And your face is stupid in Tekken 6! What'dya think abut THAT, HUH? *Pokes repeatedly* Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh?

Kazuya: Your stupid son is right, NEVER do that EVER again.

Lee: Psh, lol owned XD. Uh...why do you have a unicorn on your back? You know, on the back of your shirt? And why do you wear suits a lot? You don't look good for crap :D!

Heihachi: ...*Backs away* Pedo. AND NO ONE WANTS T SEE SAGGY OLD MAN BITS D:! Actually, I'm not scarred anymore...it'll be worse someday. Anyway, YOU SUCK!

Lili: I like you C:. Nice fashion style! My sister loves it when you make penguins pop out of the ground! Anyways, how DO you make penguins pop out of the ground O_O?

Jin (Again): *Holds up gauntlets from Tekken 5: Dark Resurrection* These were my favorite gauntlets that match you the most and are mostly Kazama. Put. Them. On.

Hwoarang: Also owned! Um...I like motorcycles o3o?

Xiaoyu: OMG Yay! You can have this Panda Doll. *Gives*

Jin (AGAIN): AND YOU CAN HAVE A KICK! HYAH! *Karate Kicks*

That's it, really :P. *Points two fingers, slides into the darkness...slides back out, waves* Bye! *Slides back in*

Jin: Good God, when will this girl learn? I'm not a witch!

Ani: No, you're a *meow*

*Silence*

Ani: Again with the cuss detector? I'm about to punch someone!

Kazuya: He's too weak to control it!

Lars: This coming from the guy that got his *meow* handed to him by his son countless times.

Heihachi: Don't forget his father!

Kazuya: Hate you. I hate you all.

Jin: Can I finish now? *coughs* As I was saying, I didn't learn how to control it, because I didn't want to have it in the first place. Why control something you don't want? And as for my family, you've seen that we don't die easily. AND I LOOK DOWN RIGHT SEXY IN TEKKEN 6!

Lee: The unicorn on my back? It stands for masculinity.

Hwoarang: Something that you don't have…

Lee*derp face*: And my suits are what attract the ladies, so I must wear them all the time.

Heihachi: Pfft, no one knows what muscle is anymore.

Lili: Like this! *She touches the ground and out pops a penguin* It's all in the wrists movements.

Jin: I refuse to put them on!

Ani: Quick! Someone grab him!

Jin: AAAAHHHH! *Half of the fighters tackle him and pin him to the ground*

*Xiaoyu wakes up*: A panda doll? YES! *She takes the doll* This is going on eBay!

*The fighters finally get the gauntlets on Jin, leaving him curled up in a ball on the floor*

Jin: I feel so violated…

Anisha: Nothing a little bit of therapy can't fix!

Marik: If your idea of therapy is having him talk about his feelings, then you should just go ahead and send him to the asylum.

Ani: Alright, next question!

_I've got a few!_

For Jin: Why don't you wear your purple hoodie anymore? You looked sexy in that...! Not that you aren't anyway. *derpfais*

For Heihachi: I swear the officials should have caught onto the child abuse. Throwing sons off cliffs nd into volcanoes. :C

For Xiaoyu: ... Why do you STILL act like you are five? Really? *pokerfais* (at least you looked a bit more grown up in T4)

For Lee: How many? And I think you know what I mean ahemwomenaheminbedahem. Sorry, had a bit of a cough then xD

Jin: Thank you…I guess.

Xiaoyu: I do not act five! Did you not see Blood Vengeance? I looked AND acted like a sexy eighteen year-old!

Asuka: Uh huh. Keep telling yourself that.

Lee: Well let me see…*starts whispering to himself* Today is Saturday, so about –

Ani: Hello? Minor in the house!

Jun: Well you weren't too concerned about that all this time.

Ani: I know, but hearing about his sex life is something I wouldn't mind keeping out of my head.

Christie: How about we stop talking about this and get to the next question?

_(evil laugh) well this is gonna be fun!_

Lili-You are awesome! And so is your hair! How do you get it so nice?

Bob- if you had to assassinate someone right now, who would it be?

Nina- Is purple your favorite colour? (random much)

Hwoarang- YOUR MAMMAS A FAIL!

All guys- who is the hottest girl here?...

Ok thanks! Blaze-Fire10 out...

Lili: Well, I have this amazing hair dresser that I go to in that's in Paris, and he does my hair. Maybe I can take you there if you like?

Bob: The embodiment of evil.

*The camera looks at Jin*

*Jin points to Kazuya*: Hey, I'm not the Devil's son, not him personally. Go to my douche of a father.

Nina: Purple is a dark colour that I can use as cover in the dark. *loads sniper rifle* Anymore questions?

The guys:…Christie

Anna: Now wait just a damn minute! Why her?

Paul: Because she doesn't look like a toddler.

Xiaoyu: Hey!

Marshall: Isn't a spoiled brat.

Lili: Hmph!

Jin: Isn't my COUSIN or MOM.

Kazama females: Well then…

Kazuya: Isn't slutty.

Anna: You don't have to be mean about it!

Bruce: And…

Females: WE GET IT!

Anisha: And I guess that ends the show for this episode. Tune in next time when we hit either Thanksgiving, or Black Friday evening for an update.

Ani: Until then…*looks at her school agenda* I HAVE AN ALGEBRA TEST TO STUDY FOR!

Marik: And we are clear!


End file.
